Anxiety really makes us react to more things and thus create stress. Because we worry about more things our brain signals the body to activate the self preservation systems more often, and for longer. This creates physical and emotional stress in both brain and body.

Our self preservation system is only interested in our short term survival – will we be alive in ten minutes or an hour? It doesn’t look at what is coming later. It doesn’t care what we’ll be doing next year, and it doesn’t care if we feel happy. It’s a simple system designed to keep us alive. If we’re being mugged or slipping on ice it’s our best friend, but when it is switched on and kept on long term, it’s a real problem.

I highly recommend Yoga. We can’t expect to tighten up our muscles day after day without pain or discomfort unless we stretch them out in the right ways. I find I’m less tired and stressed at the end of a day when I’ve bee keeping up a practice of yoga. It saves me money on chiropractic bills too. So, if you’ve been thinking about doing something positive this Autumn this would be one of my top picks!

In Athlone check out: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Niamh-Yoga/386595791498401?fref=ts

I was asked for some advice on how to know if what your feeling might be anxiety. Here’s a list to help you, (most of these were big issues in my life when I was anxious).

If you experience many of these you probably have high anxiety.

The good news is that if you have high levels of anxiety you can greatly improve your life by reducing worry and anxiety, things can get much easier for you.

1. How is your sleep? Do you suffer from any of the following: Usually taking a very long time to fall asleep. Waking several times during the night. Waking early and not being able to go back to sleep.

2. Do you experience Irritable Bowel Syndrome – Pressure to go to the toilet when worrying. On-going pain, constipation, flatulence, or diarrhea?

3. Do you experience absent-mindedness – forgetting simple thing like what you came into a room for, where you left your keys etc.?

4. Are you hyper-vigilant – spotting small detail, quickly summing people up, noticing what might be at risk of being knocked off a table before others do etc.?

5. Worrying about what others think – Are you re-running conversations you’ve had, and worrying whether you were misunderstood or if you got your point across, second guessing your decisions, etc.

6. Are you avoiding trying in case you might fail and thus waste the opportunity – The feeling of ‘If I don’t try I can’t be seen to fail’?

7. Are you avoiding people or situations that make you anxious – such as: particular individuals, going out socially, making appointments, crowds, speaking in public etc.

8. Do you suffer from procrastination – putting off what you want to do or need to do? For example: often watching TV, playing online games or video games, to keep your mind off upcoming tasks. Usually this occurs where any task feels crushing or pressured and you just avoid it even though it’ll be more urgent and more pressure later.

9. Do you have frequent pain or ‘butterflies’ in the belly when worrying or do you find your heart pounding or your chest tightening during everyday situations?

10. Are you often tired or suffering low energy? Very often people with anxiety are tired in the mornings and have energy late at night.

11. Do you catch colds often or take longer than usual to recover from infections etc?

12. Does anger sometimes explode in you from minor things? Are you on a hair trigger for anger?

13. Are you uncomfortable receiving a compliment?

14. Do you become angry or anxious when getting advice, perhaps feeling it is a judgement on you that the deliverer thinks you need it?

15. Do you question what you know, or feel you have to make excuses for everyday stuff? I.E. Starting with ‘You are probably full already but…’, ‘I’m sorry to ask but…’.

16. Are you shy about asking strangers a simple question, such as asking the price of something in a shop, or making a phone call?

17. Do you feel you always have to be right, and then regret some of your actions around that later on?

18. Do you feel under attack in meetings, even feeling you have to clarify your comments when someone agrees with you?

19. Do you find at times that tension is released by shopping, but where you’re unhappy about what you bought later on?

20. When something makes you feel uncomfortable do you get a hot flush or a prickly surge under your hair?

21. Do you clench your jaw or tighten muscles when you concentrate, finding them sore afterwards?

22. Do you start courses but fail to follow through on them?

23. Do you get hugely enthused about something for a short while and can get a lot done, but then find that it is a temporary motivation feeling?

24. Are you easily upset and then keep running the thing which upset you over and over again?

Change is easier than you think.

About 1 in 5 of the people has excess anxiety. We nearly all hide it if we suffer it, but inside feeling the knot or churning of worry in your gut, a tight chest and shallow breath, racing thoughts, feelings of overwhelm and stress are often the reality.

If you’ve felt like this for years can it really get better?

I can remember anxiety from before I was four years old. My earliest memories are of being painfully shy, always afraid of new people. As time went on I lived with that knot in my stomach and second guessed myself all the time.

I had a deep doubt about my abilities and self from an early age. Concentrating in school was hard as the anxiety and fear distracted me. That re-enforced those feelings. My age 5 I ‘knew’ I was a failure, not as good as everyone else, and felt even worse. It was an odd feeling. I’d fight for attention and try to hide that I felt bad, but deep inside it pushed my behaviour. I didn’t try much as I ‘knew’ on a gut level that I wouldn’t succeed.

That was a pattern that continued through life. Trying, but holding back. A self fulfilling prophecy of not quite succeeding. As time went on things got worse. You stick out when you’re twitchy and nervous. School isn’t the easiest place and bullying is easily attracted to the anxious kid. That just compounded the issues for me.

By the time I left school a 18 I was having panic attacks around going into classrooms. I booked a course in University College Dublin three times, I paid for it twice, but I never made it in the door at that point of life. Each time the anxiety would kick in and I’d find a good excuse not to go. ‘Too tired – wouldn’t get much out of it’, ‘better to do it in six months’, ‘it was the wrong course when I think about it’, and so on. The anxiety will protect the ego with a series of excuses. It doesn’t want us to give up our anxiety as it’s trying to help us avoid bad feeling. Classrooms felt bad so I was pushed away from them just like I’d be pushed to get away from a burning building. I was even getting panic attacks at times.

Life continued to be limited. A few areas went OK, where the anxiety was lesser, but always the over analysis, re-running conversations, worrying about what everyone thought, and feeling like I couldn’t succeed was there.

That stayed the case for decades until I accidentally found a therapist who could help. I wasn’t looking for change, in fact I ‘knew’ that I couldn’t. Life was just hard and I kept telling myself I needed to try harder, that I was lazy, and stupid. She was really clear on one thing. While she could help me she couldn’t change for me. That was fine, I didn’t expect change anyhow, just to get a piece of paper at the end saying I’d done the therapy.

Bit by bit things surprised me. I found myself sleeping better, no longer taking hours to drift off, I began to worry less often, and life got easier. Instead of seeing all the ways something could go wrong I saw a few ways things could go right.

Bit by bit life improved. It wasn’t instant. It took several months, but looking back at it that was amazingly fast compared to the 30+ years it had been building with me!

I even went from terror of classrooms to where I now love to present to a crowded room. I could never have imagined that. Sitting at the back with no intention of taking part was almost impossible for me in the past, but now I present seminars, speak to community groups, and love every second of learning and presenting.

Success came easier, life changed wonderfully. I can say with absolute certainty that anxiety can change. It can be reduced. It can be overcome. It can stop ruling your life.

In thousands of clinical sessions I’ve seen the same thing happen for others too. You have to want it, you have to commit to change. But it can happen!

Here’s a few of my favourite comments from other former fellow sufferers of anxiety:

“I think more about pleasant things now, I don’t over-think”.

“I dealt with my past. I laugh more. It’s real laughter. I didn’t laugh like that for years”.

“I can read books again, I sing and enjoy music. I don’t need any medication to breath deeply”.

“ I’ve started to live again. I have the tools and techniques I need to live a happier life”.

“I feel equipped to deal with situations that would have stressed me out previously”.

“I am a more positive person and feel more comfortable in my own skin”.

“I feel much less stressed and my anxiety levels and really decreased. Its great!”

“Being more calm in myself, putting things that matter into perspective and setting goals to achieve these, feeling happier, confident more in myself “.

“At last I can be in control of myself in crowds, enjoy a night out”.

“I feel so much more grounded and content”.

“There have been huge changes in the last few months – more conscious of myself and less conscious of others”.

“Putting into practice the different techniques has really helped to make life easier. I feel less anxious and happier”.

“When I began therapy I was experiencing 5-7 panic attacks a day… …After just 7 sessions I have not had a panic attack in months”.

“My anxiety is reduced 85% and I feel more confident in busy areas”.

Have hope!

Keep looking for the right way for you!

Never give up!

Change is easier than you think!

One on the things I hear a lot from people who’ve been in therapy before is ‘I’ve dealt with that already’.

Yet they talk about if for a minute and get visibly upset.
Would you like to know how you can be sure you’ve dealt with something?

It’s simple. When you think about and really step into that old memory and you find it doesn’t hurt any longer.
That’s how you know it’s dealt with.

Not thinking about it, pushing the memory away, or pretending it’s not painful means it’s still stored in a way that can pressure your emotions and create stress and anxiety.

It’s the thing that you really don’t want to look at that’s most likely to be holding you back. It’s kind of obvious. If it hurts so much you won’t even look at it or talk about it then you know for certain that there is a lot of hurt locked in there. Your mind is trying to avoid it, but that keeps it ticking and pressuring your systems.

It’s a bit like when a bill comes in and you can’t deal with it, so you don’t even open it. You just put it to one side so it’s not in your face all day, but yet you know it’s there and on a lower level it keeps bothering you and adds to your stress until you do deal with it.

We can keep torturing ourselves for years to avoid a bad feeling now. How long do you want to feel bad? That’s how long you should bury or avoid the real issue.

If you know something is hurting but you’re pushing it down like that, then congratulations! You know how to make your life better. You just need to deal with that issue, and things can be better. Find a method that discharges the locked-in emotion. If your mind re-evaluates pain properly, then it can simply fade. Look for a win, not just a band-aid.

Too many of us (myself included for too long) just accept things as ‘how my life is’, but which can change for the better. Pick the goal that will let you enjoy life the most and seek ways to achieve that.

Change is easier than you think.